Chuck your razors, Movember is here

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Megan Osborne

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No Shave November is upon us and people who are into men with that rugged lumberjack look are looking forward to all the glorious beards, scruff and mustaches there will be to behold, all in the name of prostate cancer awareness.

With Movember comes plenty of memes and by now you may have encountered one that says “Girls who participate in No Shave November will also participate in No D December.”

Groundbreaking.

The good thing about this is its function as a screening process for assholes. Anyone who honestly thinks the only women he or she is going to engage in intercourse with in his or her lifetime are going to be bald head-to-toe except for perfectly arched eyebrows, fluffy eyelashes and a thick mane of hair is daftly misinformed.

The bad news is how indoctrinated the idea that women are hairless creatures is in our society and it’s memes like this one that make this apparent. Even women are in on this war on female hair, whether it’s concerning legs, armpits or pubes.

Abstaining from leg and armpit shaving is seen as a practice carried out by crunchy-granola types who think razors are bad for the environment or something. Both are aesthetic concerns, while men aren’t held up to the same standard of baldness. But is a man actually less likely to be interested in a woman with fuzzy pits or legs?

Likely not. Let’s consider hook-up culture for a moment. If a woman who doesn’t shave chooses to go home with someone, when the clothes come off to reveal (ta-da!) hairy armpits and the engaging party is disgusted, she is in power to leave the situation and the other person doesn’t get laid. But really, who honestly thinks so highly of themselves that in the heat of the moment they’re going to reject sex with an individual because they’re too hairy?

Those who do aren’t worth a damn anyway.

Female pubic hair is another issue entirely. It’s not some weird hippie thing like fuzzy legs and pits are, though they all share the argument concerning aesthetic. The extra weight pubic hair carries, though, is a health concern.

Those who shave their pubic hair run the risk of skin infections and a plethora of other uncomfortable things, and numerous gynecologists (and the Internet) will inform you that it isn’t good for your lady bits to go completely bald.

Of course, it does come down to personal choice. If you don’t like being hairy, don’t be, but don’t let societal norms tell you what makes you comfortable in your own skin.

The notion that hair on the female body negates any sort of sex appeal is just absurd. Nobody can honestly argue that Julia Roberts isn’t attractive because of her armpit hair.

As for me, I’ve gotten a pretty decent six-month head start on No Shave November.

Megan Osborne can be contacted at [email protected].